Stardate 63382.5

 

            Elayne’s memorial service was held at Betazed’s Embassy in San Francisco.  The second-youngest child of Val’ri Raiajh and Sylvan Xaran had died as the result of an accident in one of the holosuites on Starbase 719.  In a freak accident the safeties accidently disengaged and she suffered a cerebral hemorrhage when she accidently slipped and hit the back of her head on a rock in the holodeck while playing with friends.  The service was small.  Raiajh and her husband, their daughters Charissa, Katrina and Corrine; and their son Julian.  Val’ri’s father, Tolek, came from Vulcan.  Sylvan’s sister joined them, leaving Ayana behind with the Starbase’s XO and Asst. CMO.  Val’ri’s brother and his daughter, Deltan Ambassador Ilona Raiajh was also in attendance.  Their son Jonathan, who had made great strides over the past few years, actually made his way from Betazed to the surprise of everyone. 

 

            Five years earlier the doctors at the facility where Jonathan resided noted that he had a talent in art and suggested that he be allowed to take some classes at one of the universities on Betazed.  Those classes proved quite beneficial in aiding him in gaining independence.  Although he had not spoken since the accident, he had gained control over his telepathic abilities.  For the trip, he had asked a female friend from the school to join him to act as a voice for him when he needed one.

 

            Raiajh and Xaran chose Earth because they had spent much of their married life together on the planet of Raiajh’s birth.  They had made their home here, and hoped to return to live out the rest of their days after their time on Starbase 719.

 

            After the service at the Embassy, the family took a small chartered boat out to the middle of San Francisco Bay and spread Elayne’s ashes into the winds that blew across the bay.

 

            Back at the apartment that Raiajh and Xaran had kept in San Francisco, they were spending time with their guests after the day’s events.   Jonathan’s friend, who had remained silent throughout the entire day walked up and spoke to Raiajh.

 

            “Does m’lady be needing any assistance?” she asked.  Raiajh turned to look at her son’s companion.  She had not heard speech patterns like that since she served on the Arcturus.   It did pique her curiosity as only a few natives of the planet had chosen to leave.

 

            “You may help if you wish.  But tell me how did you get from Avalon to Betazed?”

 

            “I took fancy to those glorious sky-chariots that came to visit Avalon.  One day me asked the lord of one to grant the fee of passage in return for work.  He be leaving me on Darona when I refused to be performing any work that I not be comfortable with.  He be wanting to take me to his bed.  I told him that I no be doing that with a man I no love.”

 

            Raiajh replied, “I’m sorry that happened.  How were you able to get to Betazed from Darona?”

 

            “While I be at Jarkana spaceport I be singing to earn some meals and keep.  There I be meeting a man who be owning a wine making farm on Betazed.  He be telling me that spaceport no place for girl like me and he would be taking me, if I wished it, to Betazed to a school to be studying music.  It be sounding funny as I not know one could be studying singing in a school.  I be telling him so.  He gets to be showing me on computer that one can indeed be studying singing in a school.  So I go to Betazed.  As thank you to m’lord benefactor I be helping on his farm when he be doing harvest time.  It be there I be meeting Jonathan.”

 

            “Mr. Sarne is a kind man with a good heart.  He is Jonathan’s great-grandfather.”

 

            “That do not be possible, m’lady!  Mr. Sarne not that old!”

 

            Val’ri smiled.  The girl was right. Sorkan Sarne did not look that old.  “Anya, Mr. Sarne’s mother is from Betazed, but his father is from a very-long lived species known as El-Aurians. Mr. Sarne has lived on Betazed for over a century.  I want you to continue your tale though.  How did you and my son become friends?”

 

            A confused look came over the Avalonian girl’s face.  “Your son, m’lady?  Jonathan be saying you be his Aunt.  His mother died when he be seven.”

 

            “He is correct, but so am I.  His biological parents died in an accident when he was seven.  Dr. Xaran and I became guardian to him and his sister Charissa at that time.  Two years later when we formally adopted Charissa we adopted Jonathan also.  So yes, he is my son.”

 

            “That do be making you his mother.  As for how we be friends; I be working harvest three winters back.  I be noticing Jonathan work alone.  So I be joining him.  I did be finding it strange that he not talk to anyone.”  She began to blush as she continued.  “I be thinking to meself that he do be handsome.  Then suddenly I be hearing him saying thank you and that he be thinking I be pretty.  I not be realizing at first that he be talking in me mind.  But then I be realizing that I not say he be handsome aloud. So I be telling him that I no like him being in me mind.  It be then he be saying he be sorry, but he be having no other way to be communicating as he no be able to talk.  After I got over being angry, I do be saying I be sorry to him and be telling him I would like to be friends and that it be agreeable to ‘talk’ in my mind.  I be coming with him here as he said he may be needing someone to be talking for him.  Truthfully I do no understand why he be bringing me.  I no be needing to talk for him yet. Most people be understanding enough.”

 

            “Perhaps he wanted a friend along.  This is one of the few times he had traveled away from Betazed.  He has never traveled alone.”

 

            “I do not be thinking of that, m’lady.”

 

            The two continued talking for some time, and Val’ri walked away with some interesting insights into her now-adult son.

 

            After a few days in San Francisco, they returned to their life on Starbase 719. As the days turned into weeks, despite their counseling sessions with the Station’s Counselor, Tobias Wyatt, the strain of Elayne’s death was taking its toll on Raiajh and Xaran.

                     

 

Space, the Final Frontier… 

 

Star Trek: Personal Logs

 

“Requiem” By Nadine B. Bach

 

 

Starbase 719

Stardate 63461.9

 

            Sitting in the office of Counselor Wyatt, it was evident that Raiajh and Xaran were having problems.  They were both extremely distraught because of Elayne’s loss and despite these counseling sessions they were having a hard time reconciling their loss. Instead of being productive, this particular session seemed to have the opposite effect.

 

            Suddenly Xaran spoke to his wife, “Why didn’t you do something more to keep the accident from happening in the first place?”

 

            What he said was like a slap in the face to Val’ri.  They had tried to keep things amicable in the sessions.  It was tougher for them because they not only heard the words but felt the emotions behind them, one of the benefits, or in this case, a drawback of being telepathic or empathic. She calmly replied, “The engineering staff looked over the holodecks.  They have not been able to further ascertain what happened. No one can figure out why the safeties were disengaged.  If I were able to I would take her place.  She’s my daughter too, and I miss her just as much as you do.”  Despite her calm exterior, under the surface she truly was as devastated by their loss as Xaran was.  Her eyes showed the pain and anguish she was feeling; both her own and his.  His next statement stung even deeper. 

 

            “This isn’t working.  I’m going back to Earth as soon as I can get a transfer.”

 

            Xaran rose from the couch and left a rather distraught Raiajh, who at that point buried her head in her hands and began to cry.  Wyatt’s voice followed him.

 

            “Doctor Xaran, don’t do anything rash.  Please take some time to think about it.”

 

            After that session neither spoke to the other, except when it came to the children.

 

*          *          *

 

Starbase 719

Stardate 63468.8

 

            Xaran was talking in the infirmary with Dr. Simmons and Counselor Wyatt.  Simmons asked, “Sylvan, are you sure this is a good idea?  I don’t mind doing your work for a few weeks, but you should at least tell Val you’re leaving.”

 

            “She’ll find out soon enough, Jack.  I don’t want to talk to her right now.  All we do is fight and it’s hurting not only us but the kids too. Hopefully these couple of weeks on the Besiege will help sort everything out. Despite what I said in Tobias’ office the other day I don’t want to go back to Earth without my family and that includes Val.”

 

            Wyatt replied, “Well, that’s a start at least.”

 

            Sylvan stated, “I love my wife and family dearly, Tobias.  Elayne’s death is tearing us apart.  I don’t want to throw what I have away.  I need to figure out how to fix it.  I’m hoping these few weeks on the Besiege will help.”

 

            Jack stated, “I hope so, Sylvan.  Val’s a strong person, but part of that strength comes from you.  I’ve seen what Elayne’s death has done.  She’s surviving, but without your support she’s not the same.  Last time I saw her like this was during the war, when you were on Betazed.”

 

            “I know Jack.  I need to figure out how to move on after Elayne’s death.  Once I do that, I know I can mend fences with Val.  For now I need to get to the Besiege.

 

*          *          *

 

Starbase 719

Stardate 63469.1

 

            Raiajh was woken up in the middle of the night by Corrine, who was crying.

 

            “Mommy, I had a bad dream and I can’t find Daddy. He’s not here.”

 

            “What kind of dream?”

 

            “I dreamt that Daddy went away, and now I can’t find him.”  She handed her mother the communicator which was on the night stand next to the bed.  “Can you find him?”

 

            Taking the communicator, she pressed it, “Raiajh to Doctor Xaran.”  No reply came.  Perplexed, Val’ri asked the computer, “Computer, locate Doctor Sylvan Xaran?”

 

            “Doctor Xaran departed the starbase aboard the USS Besiege at 0100.”

 

            Corrine started crying harder.  Between her sobs she asked, “Daddy went with ‘Rissa and didn’t say goodbye?”

 

            “That appears to be the case.  He should have at least said goodbye to you, Julian and Katrina.”  Pressing her communicator again, Raiajh spoke.  “Raiajh to Lieutenant Pel.”

 

            “Pel here, ma’am.”

 

            “Ashari, open a subspace channel to Doctor Xaran on the Besiege.  Tell him that Corrine insists on talking to him.”

 

            “Yes ma’am.  I’ll patch it through to your quarters once I have him,” Pel replied.

 

            Raiajh got up out of bed and took Corrine over to the computer interface on the desk in the main living area.  She sat the child down by the computer and began to walk away.

 

            “You aren’t staying Mommy?” the child asked.

 

            “No, Corrine.  Daddy doesn’t want to talk to me right now,” Raiajh replied, with a touch of sadness in her voice.

 

            Before Corrine was able to ask her why, the computer interface in front of her activated and the Federation symbol was replaced by her father sitting in sickbay aboard the Besiege.

 

            “You should be sleeping, young lady,” was his greeting.

 

            “I had a bad dream.  Why did you go away without saying goodbye?” she replied, becoming teary-eyed again.

 

            “I’m sorry.  I didn’t have time.  My request was granted at the last minute.”

 

            “When are you coming home, Daddy?”

 

            “I’ll be back in a month.”

 

            “I’ll miss you.”

 

            “I’ll be missing everyone too.”

 

            “Even Mommy?”

 

            “Yes, even Mommy.”

 

            “Do you want to talk to Mommy?”

 

            “Not now, Corrine.  I’ll call her when I’m ready to talk.  Right now I need to get back to work.  I’ll try to call when I can.”

 

            “Ok Daddy. I love you.”

 

            “I love you too Corrine.  Now go back to bed.”

 

            “Yes Daddy,” she replied and terminated the link.

 

*          *          *

 

Starbase 719

Stardate 63540.6

 

            Rear Admiral Val’ri Raiajh sat in her office with the Station’s Counselor, Tobias Wyatt.  For the last few weeks the Admiral’s husband Dr. Sylvan Xaran had chosen to spend time on the USS Besiege as their doctor to give himself a chance to think about things.

 

            The last two months have been extremely hard on both Raiajh and Xaran.  After Elayne’s memorial service, Raiajh and Xaran had spent much of their alone time fighting, while trying to make sense of their loss.  Three weeks ago the Besiege left on its current mission and was currently en route back to the starbase.

 

            With Xaran on the Besiege, Raiajh has spent much of the last three weeks alone with just their youngest child, Corrine.   Julian and Katrina were staying with their Aunt Jill and her daughter Ayana elsewhere on the base.  The stress of the situation was taking its toll on Raiajh, who had lost five kilograms in the last two months.  It showed in her uniform as it was slightly larger than it should be. It was weight she definitely did not need to lose, considering the fact that she normally had a hard time keeping her weight at fifty kilos.  The fact that she was suffering from bouts of nausea the past few days wasn’t helping the situation.

 

            “Admiral, you really should be eating more,” Wyatt commented.

 

            “I know.  However, I’m worried about losing things that are more important to me than a few kilos.”

 

            “Perhaps these few weeks away, have allowed Doctor Xaran the chance to examine what is wrong, and work through what is troubling him. This time apart may prove beneficial.”

 

            “I hope so. All I want is for him to come home, to his family.  The last we spoke, was in your office, when he said he wanted to go back to Earth.  That is the last thing I want.  I don’t want him to leave, not like this.”

 

            “Then tell him how you feel.  Use subspace and let him know that.”

 

            “I’d rather talk to him in person and tell him,” she replied to the counselor.

 

            “It’s been a while since you’ve toured one of the Fifth Fleet ships.  Perhaps it’s time for an Admiral’s Inspection of the Besiege while the ship is en route back to the Starbase.  It would give you a few days to talk.  It would also be a good away mission for one of the Fleet Cadets.”

 

            “I like your idea Counselor.  I’ll have Cathryn make arrangements to have a runabout prepped and ready to launch in four hours.  You and Doctor Simmons have until then to decide which cadet makes the trip.”

 

*          *          *

 

USS Besiege

Stardate 63549.5

 

            It had been a rough two months for Dr. Sylvan Xaran.  The loss of Elayne had hit him hard.  He understood it was an accident, but still it was tough on him.   Today was hard on him too, as the stardate of his anniversary was just hours away, and he was feeling bad about having to miss this important day.  The only other time he missed their anniversary was when he was on Betazed during the Dominion War, where he had no choice in the matter as Betazed was occupied by the Dominion itself at the time.

 

            His time on board the Besiege was not received well by his eldest daughter, Charissa, who was one of the engineers aboard.  She stopped by early on in the mission to tell him that she thought he was being extremely selfish for being out here at a time when his wife and family needed him most and avoided him since.

 

            Sitting in the quarters of the CMO on the Besiege, Xaran fingered the platinum wedding band on his finger.  The ring never left his finger since the day Raiajh placed it there nineteen years ago.  Sitting there he remembered the first time they had a chance to spend more than five minutes together.  They were eating lunch together and she had picked up on one of his stray thoughts, wondering if she would have dinner with him.  At the time he was not even aware that she had similar telepathic abilities.

 

            He probably would not be here today, if he didn’t pursue the matter further after she said she would ‘get back to him’ about dinner.  It was just the way she said it that made it sound more like it was possible and not the brush-off it could have been.  When they met up later that day after receiving a communiqué from her brother, in an effort to help lift her spirits, he offered again.  Her answer changed to a more hopeful ‘perhaps another night’.  The following day, after stopping by the Quartermaster’s office to try one last time, she finally agreed.  He arranged to bring her back to the Surak II where they went to the holodeck for dinner and a walk in the park afterward.  Walking into the empty holodeck was interesting...

 

 

Stardate 44526

Earth Year 2367

 

            Although he was wearing his uniform, she had changed into an off-duty outfit that he thought she probably replicated recently, as it was a more current style and not something that was in fashion around eighty years earlier.   She also wore her hair loose, instead of held back at the nape of her neck, with just a headband to hold it off her face.   Her choice of dress had intrigued him, as it indicated an emotional response to the evening’s activities.  He did notice that she did allow him glimpses of emotional responses. She smiled, she blushed.  She also allowed him to see her when she had lost control of her emotions the day before.  It had given him a sense of hope that she had accepted his invitation because she actually wanted to have dinner with him and not out of a sense of guilt because she had picked up on his thoughts.  She certainly seemed to be interested in him as something more than a friend.

 

            She noticed that he was still wearing his uniform and stated, “I’m sorry.  I should have asked how I should have dressed for this evening.”

 

            “What you have on is fine, Val.  I would have changed myself, however I didn’t have a chance.  My appointments ran until just a few minutes ago.  I hope you don’t mind me saying so, but you look beautiful. Even more so than that first night I saw you in the main recreation room here on the Arcturus.

 

            A shy smile played across her lips as she replied, “Thank you.”  Her cheeks took on that emerald hue as she began to blush.  He found it intriguing that she showed him these hints of emotional responses.  Counselor Jaron had described her as being stoic and ‘typically Vulcan’ in her sessions with him.

 

            “I have arranged to bring you back to the Surak this evening.  I hope you don’t mind.”

 

            “That would be fine.”

 

            The two headed toward the transporter room and beamed over to the Surak.  He then led her down the hall to the ship’s holodeck; something the Arcturus was not equipped with.  The pair walked into the empty holodeck.  Raiajh had a confused look on her face.

 

            “I thought you said we were having dinner?” she asked.

 

            “We are.”  Pressing a few buttons on a computer interface, the room transformed into a restaurant.

 

            Her eyes wide with amazement, she stated, “What kind of room is this? I’ve never seen anything like it before. It’s as if you transported us directly to Paris.  I don’t remember the name of the place, but there is a restaurant that looks exactly like this near the Palais de la Concorde in Paris.  At least it looked this way last time I went.”

 

            “It’s called a holodeck.  The technology is based on that used for the transporters and replicators.  It’s actually a pretty new addition on starships.  This is the first time I’ve used one myself.”

 

            The maitre‘d walked over to show them to a table.  Val’ri took Sylvan’s hand and they walked to the table near a window that overlooked the River Seine.

 

            Dinner progressed at a slow pace as they actually did more talking than eating.  Once done with dinner Xaran asked for the program to change to a park scene.  Taking her hand they began to walk down the moonlit path before them.

 

            After a few minutes walking, Raiajh innocently asked, “How are we not walking into the walls? The room isn’t that big that we could have walked all this time and not run into the wall.”

 

            “It works like a treadmill.  We walk and it’s the scenery that’s actually moving.”

 

            “There’s going to be a lot that I need to learn.  I must sound like a child asking all these questions.  I’m sorry.”

 

            “I understand. Let’s sit down.  Coming here without telling you about holodeck technology probably wasn’t such a good idea.”

 

            They walked over and sat down on one of the benches that lined the walk.

 

            “It’s been interesting.  Despite my apparent technological challenges, I’m actually enjoying this evening.”

 

            “You do know that is an emotion,” he replied.

 

            “I think by now you’ve come to realize that I do show emotions, when I wish to.”

 

            “I’ve noticed.  You’ve shown them to me, but not to any of the other counselors.”

 

            “I have no reason to.  I do not wish to get to know them on a more personal level.”

 

            “You mean friends?” he asked, sounding a bit disappointed.

 

            “Of course I want you as a friend, but at the same time I have no desire to do this with any of my friends,” she replied as she leaned toward him and gently kissed him on the lips.

 

            She had tried to say something more, but before she could he kissed her and kept on kissing her.  Before long he had her straddling his lap with her arms around his neck.  It was certainly a more comfortable position, however the kissing was becoming more passionate too.

 

            They found themselves connecting on a telepathic level; something apparently neither had considered when they first began.  The experience allowed them to learn much more about each other than they could have otherwise.  After a while they stopped kissing and sat in the same position just holding each other with Val’ri leaning her head on Sylvan’s shoulder.

 

            ”I don’t know what has gotten into me tonight. This behavior is quite atypical for me,” she stated.

 

            “Val, to be honest, its not typical behavior for me either.”

 

            “I certainly would not have done what I did if you had told me that you were promised to another.”

 

            “There’s nothing to tell.  I have already told my parents, and Anatessa, that I wasn’t going to marry her.  It is something that is no longer an issue.”

 

            “Your parents seem to think differently.”

 

            “My parents can think as they wish.  They do not make decisions about how I live my life.  What about you?  How were you able to avert being bound by that Oath of Celibacy?”

 

            “When I was born there were no other known Deltan hybrids.  If that Oath is still required, then I may still be the only one.  My mother always encouraged me to date non-Deltan males.  However, I am bound by two restrictions.  It is noted in my medical file that any relationship that I have of a physical nature must be with a member of a telepathic race and I must make my commanding officer aware of my intent beforehand.  As of this evening I have not made Commodore Johnson aware of any such intent.  I only intend to let any commanding officer, be it Commodore Johnson or another in the future, aware of any such intent just one time.”

 

            “I can certainly see not wanting to have that conversation more than once, but sometimes it doesn’t always work out that way.”

 

            “I know, however, I have always made a promise to myself that I would only have that kind of relationship with just one person; the one that I choose to call my husband.  Even then, it won’t be until the day he actually is my husband.”

 

            “What if you never find that person?”

 

            “Then maybe, I’ll change my way of thinking.  For now, I want to get to know you better.”

 

            “Where would you like me to begin?”

 

 

            It was three days after the evening on the holodeck that Xaran joined Raiajh in Commodore Johnson’s office to have that conversation.  To everyone’s surprise, they married one week to the day after their visit with the Commodore.

 

*          *          *

 

            Continuing his reverie Xaran thought back to a day in early 2374…

 

Stardate 50166.8

 

            Almost seven years later, Lt Commander Sylvan Xaran and Commodore Val’ri Raiajh had just returned to Earth, after a few months at Starbase 234 post separation from the Besiege.  Unbeknownst to him, she was feeling ill for the past two days and made an appointment to see one of the doctors at Starfleet Medical.

 

            It was a rare day for her, with the Dominion War heating up, that she was able to leave work early and spend time with him and Charissa.  When he returned home that evening she greeted him with a small, thin and nearly flat box after he came in and hugged them both.

 

            “What’s this?” he asked.

 

            “Open it and find out,” was her simple reply.

 

            He opened the box to find a small spoon inside.  It was certainly too small for him, but it was just the perfect size to feed a baby.  After three years, could it be that Julian’s procedure actually worked?  Smiling, he looked at his wife.  Through the bond that they shared, he felt her joy and happiness.  He grabbed her in an embrace that lifted her off the floor.

 

            The revelation left him nearly speechless.  All he was able to get out was “Really?” as he made sure her feet were again on the floor.

 

            She nodded. “A due date cannot be pinpointed with certainty until I’m further along.  However it should be after stardate 50649 and before stardate 50816.”

 

            Charissa looked at them.  “Care to let me in on your little secret?  What’s coming between those dates?”

 

            “There’s going to be an addition to our family.  You’re going to be a big sister,” Xaran replied.

 

            “You’re pregnant?” she asked, looking at Raiajh.

 

            “Yes!”

 

            Charissa looked at them both with tears forming in her eyes.  “What’s going to happen to me? Are you going to send me away now that you are having a child of your own?”

 

            “Charissa, why would you think we would send you away?  You are as much our child as the one that is growing inside me.  Just because your father and I became parents to you and your brother in a different way, doesn’t make you any less our children.  We still love you, and will continue to love you,” Val’ri told her.

 

            “You sent me away when you were on the Besiege,” the child countered.

 

            Val’ri replied, “Charissa, there are ships in the Federation Starfleet that are not equipped to allow children and families to live on board.  The Besiege is one of those ships because of its designation.  The Besiege is a ship that is equipped to fight against our enemies.  It wasn’t safe for you to be there.  Toward the end of the year that we were there, we were not practicing battle drills, but were actually beginning to engage the Dominion.”

 

            “Am I really going to be a big sister?” she asked, with more enthusiasm.

 

            “Yes, you are and never let anyone tell you otherwise,” Sylvan told her.

 

            She came over and hugged both of them.

 

*          *          *

 

USS Besiege

Stardate 63549.5

 

            He was beginning to see the truth in what Charissa had said to him at the beginning of this mission.  He was being selfish being here and away from his family.  But at the same time, he needed to heal.  Sitting here thinking like this was helping him not only heal, but help him make the right decisions about the future.

 

            Their daughter Katrina ended up being born while he was on Betazed for his father’s funeral.  While they were in the Loneel Valley scattering the ashes of Troy Xaran, the Dominion attacked.  He didn’t see his wife or his new daughter until after Katrina’s first birthday.

 

            The morning their son Julian was born in 2376 was one of the most memorable days in his life to that point.  With the sun just beginning to shine through between the buildings in San Francisco, his wife woke them both up with the sudden urge to deliver the baby.

 

            Being a doctor aboard the Sarek, at Starbase 234 and at Starfleet Medical, he certainly delivered his share of babies.  It was something he did miss on the Besiege. They did not plan on having Julian at home, it just happened that way.  The setting made it a memorable experience for both of them.

 

            Elayne was born at Starfleet Medical.  After seeing how much more stressed his wife was at the hospital, they chose to have Corrine at home.

 

            Then in 2385 Starfleet gave his wife the command of Starbase 719 and the Typhon Sector and they were all settled in early September of that year.  He missed having her at home those few months that he and the children had to stay behind on Earth while the base was sufficiently completed for them to join her.

 

            Between their arrival and Elayne’s untimely death there were minor skirmishes, usually with the nearby Kairn, but nothing directed against the base.

 

            About two weeks after the memorial, they had become withdrawn from each other trying to deal with their grief.  Despite getting help from Tobias Wyatt, the station’s counselor, Xaran said what he felt was the most hurtful thing he could have said to his wife. In Wyatt’s office he blamed her for Elayne’s death.  That if she had done something more, Elayne may still be alive.

 

            With things continuing to go downhill from there, he arranged this time away from the starbase. Being away allowed him to clear his mind and concentrate on what was truly important to him.  Now 48 hours out from the starbase, he hoped that when the Besiege returned, he and his wife could do whatever it would take to work things out, as he truthfully didn’t want to return to Earth without her or the children.  He decided that now would hopefully be a good time to talk to her.

 

            Before he got a chance to ask for a comm channel to the starbase, Captain McLeod made a ship-wide announcement.   “Attention all hands.  Prepare your spaces for inspection by the Admiral.”

 

            Unable to make his call, Xaran left his quarters and went to sickbay to prepare for the Admiral’s arrival.   As McLeod didn’t say which Admiral, Xaran thought it possible that the Besiege had met up with the Dauntless and it was probably Vice Admiral Penji Fil who was coming aboard for an inspection tour.

 

*          *          *

 

            Rear Admiral Val’ri Raiajh toured the Besiege with Captain McLeod, purposely leaving sickbay for last.  Her daughter, Katrina was chosen as the Fleet Space Cadet to join her on this mission.  After Raiajh had toured the entire ship, except for the sickbay, she sent Katrina to join up with her sister, Lt(JG) Charissa Xaran.

 

            Raiajh sat with McLeod in his ready room, discussing the inspection.

 

            “Captain, as always, your ship and crew exceed my expectations.”

 

            “I noticed you have not inspected sickbay, Admiral.”

 

            “I am aware of that.  I will be heading there alone as soon as we’re done here.  I’m sure I’ll find the same exemplary conditions in sickbay.”

 

            “Admiral, you wouldn’t be willing to swap CMO’s permanently?” McLeod asked, in a semi-joking manner.

 

            “That would not be advisable.  Your CMO has done an excellent job assisting Doctor Simmons these past few weeks, but he’ll be happy to get back to his position here.  Not to mention Doctor Simmons will be wishing to return to his own duties,” she replied.

 

            “I’m sure you’re looking forward to having Doctor Xaran return home.”

 

            “If he’s ready to return home he will be welcomed.  Elayne’s death hit us both pretty hard.  We both said things to each other that we would like to take back.”

 

            “During the last week his attitude has changed significantly, so perhaps he is.”

 

            Feeling hopeful, Raiajh stood.  “I hope so.  If you will excuse me, Captain, I’ll be finishing that inspection now.”

 

            “Understood, Admiral.”

 

            She stood and left McLeod’s behind in his ready room and headed toward sickbay.

 

*          *          *

 

            Upon arriving at sickbay, she entered quietly though a door that was already opened as another had just left.  As he was turned away, Xaran did not notice her enter.   Because they were both shielding themselves from the telepathic intrusion of others and he was not expecting her to be there, she was able to slip in unaware. She sat down on the diagnostic bed before alerting him of her presence.

 

            “I was wondering if you had something to help cure a broken heart, Doctor,” she said; sadness evident in her voice.

 

            Xaran turned to look at her with a smile before rushing over and giving her a hug, which she returned.  Looking into her eyes he said, “I’m sorry, Imzadi.  I know I’ve said things to hurt you.  If I could I would take it all back.  Can you forgive me?”

 

            “All is forgiven.  I know you said those things out of anger and grief, and I too apologize for things I’ve said that hurt you.  Please say you are ready to come home.”

 

            “I am, if you are willing to have me.”

 

            She pulled him closer to her and kissed him.  As they were kissing, they didn’t hear one of the Marine medics entering sickbay.  In a thick English accent, the Marine commented, “Doctor Xaran, sir?!?”

 

            All Xaran replied was, “I suppose I should take the Admiral someplace more private.”

 

            Without another word, Xaran and Raiajh left sickbay alone with one Marine medic with a rather confused look on his face.

 

            Corporal Hughes was considering reporting the CMO’s behavior to Commander Taras, the Besiege’s Executive Officer, when Lt(JG) Charissa Xaran walked in with a young girl wearing a blue-shouldered dark gray uniform of similar design to those worn by students at the Academy.  However, the girl had to be about 13 or 14 years of age.   She was probably the cadet who came with the Admiral, although the color of the shoulders surprised him, as the cadet uniforms were usually red-shouldered.

 

            Suddenly the CMO’s behavior made sense when the Lieutenant introduced the girl as her sister, Katrina Xaran.   Between the younger girl’s vulcanoid appearance and family name, he came to the quick realization that the Admiral was probably the doctor’s wife.

 

*          *          *

 

            On the bunk in the CMO’s quarters, Val’ri and Sylvan sat facing each other with their legs intertwined.  They had been talking about everything they had gone through in the past few months.  These few weeks apart made them both realize that going their separate ways after all this time was not what either wanted.

 

            ‘Before Captain McLeod announced the inspection, I was thinking about our life together.  Remember that night I took you back to the Surak and we went to the holodeck?’ Sylvan asked telepathically.

 

            ‘I remember.  It was a most interesting evening.  It certainly was an introduction to 24th century technology for me. I thought about that night too. It was certainly a unique experience for both of us.’

 

            ‘What made you kiss me?’

 

            ’I heard the disappointment in your voice when you thought I wanted to be ‘just friends’.  I wanted to show you that although I wanted you as a friend, I also wanted more.  From that first day we saw each other when you first came aboard the Arcturus I wanted to get to know you better. More than anything else, I wanted you to kiss me.  I knew if you thought I wanted to be just friends you wouldn’t.’

 

            ‘I wanted to kiss you but I was too afraid to.  Afraid you were either going to say that you weren’t interested in me, except as a friend or that you were bound by that Oath.’

 

            ‘I’ve done nothing for the past month but think about us and everything we have.  I know that what we have is something that is worth fighting for,’ she told him.

 

            ‘Not to mention our six kids.  Even though Elayne won’t be a part of our future, she’ll always be a part of us.’

 

            ’I know.  However, it’s seven, not six,’ she countered, hoping he would get the hint.

 

            ’We both haven’t been thinking straight lately.  However, last I checked there were only six: Jonathan, Charissa, Katrina, Julian, Elayne and Corrine.’

 

            She took his hand and placed it on her abdomen, ‘And one more makes seven. I found out just before I left the base to come here.  It was hard not thinking about the last thing you said to me, especially after Jack gave me the news.  I certainly don’t want any of our children to grow up not knowing their father.’

 

            ‘I’m sorry I worried you so, Imzadi. Although this time apart has been hard on both of us, it was probably what we both needed.’

 

            He pulled her into an embrace.  They just sat like that for a while.  Suddenly her stomach started grumbling audibly.

 

            “Val, when was the last time you ate?” he asked aloud.

 

            “This morning, on the runabout.  Katrina had me eat some fruit.”

 

            In a voice that sounded like he was scolding one of the children instead of talking to his wife, he said, “You know you need to eat more than that.  Get up.  Let me get something for both of us to eat.”

 

            She unwound from him and got up off the bunk and sat cross-legged on the deck in front of the bunk.  The small size of the quarters didn’t allow for a table and chairs.  Even the quarters for the captain were not big enough for such a luxury.  They had become accustomed to sharing meals sitting on the deck when they were assigned to the Besiege in 2372.

 

            He went over to the replicator and replicated a dish of tofu and vegetables that was large enough for both of them with two forks and returned with the dish and joined her on the deck.  They ate the meal quietly, with Xaran making sure that Raiajh ate a sufficient amount of the food.  Over their years together, he had been able to add a small amount of fish and some dairy to her diet for additional protein, however she still preferred a vegetarian diet.

 

            While enjoying the meal Xaran asked, “What were your impressions of the girl Jonathan brought with him from Betazed?”

 

            “She seems nice.  She was telling me that she ended up on Darona when the captain of the ship she took passage on began asking her to pay off her passage in his sleeping chambers and she refused.  Sarne found her there and brought her back to Betazed and sent her to study at the conservatory at the same university Jonathan takes art classes at.  In return she helps Sarne at his vineyard during harvest.  Why do you ask?”

 

            “The impression I got from Jonathan was that he liked her as something more than a friend.  As much as I don’t want to admit it, those classes he has been taking at the University have been helping him becoming more independent.  He even mentioned that he liked to cuddle with her and kiss her sometimes.”

 

            Val’ri thought about that last fact for a few moments.  Long ago she resigned herself to the fact that they would probably never have grandchildren from either Jonathan or Charissa.   Perhaps it was time to revisit that assessment.  “Jonathan is 28. If he wishes to behave like an adult, then I’m not going to stop him.  She seems to like him as something more than just a friend too.  She said she was a bit surprised that he brought her with him to meet his family.  According to her, on Avalon, if a girl meets a boy’s family, especially if they live in a different village, it meant their relationship was getting serious.”

 

            “I hope that wasn’t why he brought her.  He doesn’t seem to be ready for something like that.”

 

            “Sylvan, neither of us is sure what he’s ready for.  We’re not with him on Betazed. If you want, when we get back to the starbase we can call Sorkan Sarne and ask what he thinks of this.  He sees Jonathan more than anyone, except perhaps Anya.”

 

            “I don’t think that’s necessary.  We’ll make arrangements to contact Jonathan more often.”

 

            Suddenly the computer piped in with an announcement. “The stardate is now 63551.0”

 

             Raiajh smiled and raised an eyebrow.  Xaran stated, “Happy Anniversary, Imzadi.”

 

            The two leaned over the plate and kissed.  Raiajh replied, “Happy Anniversary.”

 

            Finishing with dinner, they returned the dish and utensils to the replicator to be recycled. After returning the empty plate to the replicator, Raiajh inquired as to the whereabouts of their younger daughter.  “Computer, please locate Cadet Katrina Xaran.”

 

            The computer replied, “Cadet Xaran is located in sickbay.”

 

            “Shall we see what she’s up to?  She’s probably talking Corporal Hughes’ ear off,” Xaran stated.

 

            “That would probably be a good idea considering she’s supposed to be with Charissa,” Raiajh replied.

 

            The two left the cabin and walked back over to sickbay, leaving Raiajh’s uniform jacket behind.  Upon arriving they found Corporal Hughes sitting on one of the bio beds while Katrina was inventorying the items in the sickbay.

 

            When they arrived, Raiajh spoke, “Corporal, I hope Cadet Xaran hasn’t been too much trouble.”

 

            “No ma’am.  She volunteered to do an inventory.  She says she does the medical inventory back on the starbase also.”

 

            Raiajh replied, “She does.  Doctor Simmons says she does an excellent job, which isn’t surprising.  She’s been telling both me and her father that she wanted to be a cadet since she was eight.”

 

            Katrina began to blush, “Mom, please stop.”  She walked over and handed the padd with the completed inventory to Corporal Hughes.

 

            He looked at it and replied, “Good work, Cadet. Thank you.  Go spend some time with your parents.”

 

            She went over and gave Dr. Xaran a hug.  “I missed you, Daddy.”

 

            “I missed you too.  Where’s your sister?  You were supposed to be with her.”

 

            “I got bored and she wanted to play poker with some of the engineers and security personnel so she brought me here.”

 

            Sylvan laughed.  “At least she didn’t take you with her.  You’re a bit young to be playing poker.”

 

            “I didn’t want to learn to play anyway.  I have more fun helping out in sickbay.”

 

            “Enough helping in sickbay for today; you have homework to do,” Val’ri reminded her.  “Just because you got chosen by Counselor Wyatt and Doctor Simmons to come with me doesn’t mean you get a pass on your school work.”

 

            “I already have most of it done, between the shuttle here and with Charissa earlier.  I’ll get it all done before we get back.  Can’t I spend some time with you and Dad?” she pleaded.

 

            “As long as you work on your studies tomorrow,” Val’ri told her.  Katrina agreed.

 

            Katrina reached into the utility pocket of her pants and pulled out a disk and handed it to Sylvan with a big smile.  “Corrine and Julian asked me to give this to you and Mom.  Happy Anniversary.”

 

            The three left sickbay and headed back to the CMO’s quarters for some family time.

 

The End

 

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